hawkwing_lb: (Default)
So my supervisor approves of the presentation and paper I'm going to give to the General Public Saturday week. I like my supervisor a lot. She's the kind of supervisor who'll make time to show me how to make my .ppts a hair more effective, or to point out that in a paper for the General Public I should be extra clear about to whom I refer.

Remind me to do nice things for my supervisor. She is an excellent person.
hawkwing_lb: (Default)
On Wednesday, I got myself a proper fitness program, thanks to one of the lovely staff at the college gym. This new program involves three sessions a week: one pure cardio, one pure resistance, and one mixed.

I started today, with the mixed session. Running, benchpress, lunges, leg press, cycling.

It's tough. The cardio, especially: I've lost more stamina than I have strength. (I can still bench 55kg in four sets of six reps, and my starting leg press is four sets of ten reps at 52kg, so there.) But I will get to a place where I can do better, eventually.

One of the Classics postgrads had her PhD commencements today. So after I picked up some books in the library, I got some soup and ate it on the steps of the chapel (cold November sunlight glittering above the buildings) while waiting for the commencements folks to process out so I could congratulate her... at least, until a security guard came to move us along from the terminus of the procession. It was great to see her and her family so happy.

Of course, then I had to spend some hours reading for research, and then bottom dropped out of my stamina at 1730 so that instead of staying to go out for drinks I had to come home and crash by the fire, but still. Mostly a good day.
hawkwing_lb: (Helps if they think you're crazy)
I know, you're all shocked.

Today! I dropped off the book with my supervisor. (Ran into a viva'd student of hers, so remind me, self, that I should drop him a line for coffee.) Went to the bookshop. (I love the bookshop, but Oh Man, the difference between it and Blackwell's.) Formatted my bibliography. Totted up something that might make an Outline and an Analytical Commentary, which the School wants. Finished off a review for Tor.com. Answered email.

Went, for a wonder, to the gym. We must begin again at the very beginning, and work back up: in the service of reprogramming my emotions, I'm not permitted to level insults at myself for needing a reasonable amount of time and work to return to what I consider decent levels of fitness. As a beginning session, 5K on the bike (inside 12 minutes) 2K on the rowing machine (inside 11 minutes), and some intervals on the treadmill, isn't all that shabby.

The weather continues mild, although the forecast promises rain to come. If I don't think to hard, I can be calm, and almost optimistic. We are a process, not a destination. I'm going to try to live the process, rather than dwell on destinations.
hawkwing_lb: (Default)
6km in 15:00, exercise bike. 3x12 reps @40kg, benchpress. 3x10, back extensions. 3x12 reps @ 40kg, seated row. 3x8 reps @18kg, bicep curl. Treadmill, intervals, 3.2km in 26:00.

Mass: 100.3-101.3kg. (The gym scales seems rather labile.)

Greek accomplished. New thesis chapter file document opened. I suspect I need to make an outline for What Goes Here. Unexpected socialising with a friend-like person who has just submitted her thesis.

Tonight the train has internet. The future, can has?
hawkwing_lb: (Mordin wrong)
I've been assigned a swanky study carrel in the swankiest building on campus, the Long Room Hub. The building itself's only two years old: there's wood panelling everywhere and fabulous views of Front and Fellows Square out great big windows; skylights; a central atrium; a "Conversation Space" with comfy chairs; a kitchen that has a dishwasher; and a shower in the basement. My own desk. My own desk-locker. Shelves. An actual office chair - padded, with swivel.

I'm so excited about this, I'm having a hard time settling in to work. The chair swivels! I can look out the windows! Walls and ceiling are all panelled in lovely rich wood.

I feel like up till now, I've been travelling coach. And out of the blue someone upgraded me to first class. It doesn't get much better than this - funding, a fancy study carrel, undeserved respect. Now to live up to expectations, finish my Greek, and take some more notes.
hawkwing_lb: (Helps if they think you're crazy)
Plato Greek, review for Tor.com, Callimachus Greek, cannibalising of old presentation for instant!progress on the thesis, gym.

1.38 miles in 15:00, treadmill. 11km in 30:00, exercise bike. Benchpress 1x8 at 35kg, 3x5 at 40kg (both including bar), bicep curl 2x5 at 24kg, 1x5 at 16kg. Some other mucking about with free weights. Very short cool-down row.

Mass: between 101.2 and 102kg.

Perhaps I am fit enough to contemplate climbing again without much terror. We shall see. (Starting maybe Sunday week, I think. I will have a desk on campus by then.)
hawkwing_lb: (Helps if they think you're crazy)
I read and reviewed a book. I asked three interview questions. I sent one interview query. I got my supervisor's blessing to write an abstract for this conference. (I'm still not sure what I'm writing the abstract on, but details! Details!) I exchanged actual spoken words with other humans, including my supervisor. I wrote 150 words on my thesis, and feel I may possibly be beginning to reacquire momentum. I ran 0.5 miles and exercise biked 5.5km. I bench-pressed 3x12 18kg. I bicep curled 3x5 20kg. I queried the status of poems on submission.

I drank too much diet Coke and ate too much chocolate. Working on healthier habits = hard.

So I didn't really do all that much today.
hawkwing_lb: (Ned virtue)
Having not slept Sunday night, and proceeded to be social and go to the gym on yesterday, I actually slept for twelve hours last night. Much to my relief.

I'm not sure that this counts as waking refreshed, but hey.

So now I guess I should go do some thesis-ising. Since I have about seven weeks to write 14K, I should get my lazy arse in some kind of gear already.
hawkwing_lb: (DA2 isabela facepalm)
Did I mention I saw a tortoise yesterday? Two tortoises, actually: one sitting in his shell in the middle of one of the gravel paths up Lykavittos hill, and the other, somewhat larger, trundling along through long grass in the underbrush. He (or she) was making a good clip, too: I'm always surprised that tortoises aren't, in fact, all that slow.

(Tortoises are cool. I never get past that sudden shock of cool, it's a living fossil! when I see one. They have armour.)

I spent today working on a required Plan Of Work For Academic Year 2012-2013 for my mandatory progress review. I finished it, too. It only took me six hours to write not quite the thousand mandatory words. (Actually, I have something like 850. I doubt they will count individually.)

I have a review to write for Strange Horizons, on Juliet E. McKenna's Dangerous Waters and Darkening Skies. My resounding feeling about these books is meh, why should I care?

Also, I am tired. Lonely. Feeling very isolated. I've burned through my fun paperback reading in the last three weeks, and what's left is either work or the next best thing. And ebooks, pleasant as they are, just aren't so comfortable for reading on the couch when one's laptop is one's ereader.

I want to whine. So tell me something good?
hawkwing_lb: (DA 2 scaring the piss)
I'm heading off very very early tomorrow morning to Greece.

There are a number of things I'm worried about, and a number of things I have to do while I'm there. For my own research, I'm trying to get permission to look at archives from the EFA, and from the Archaeological Society as well. (Advice, dear internets, on convincing the nice Greek people to let me look at their archaeological reports?)

The other thing I absolutely must do is accomplish what my postgrad handbook instructs me to do by mid-April:

1. A draft chapter of between 8,000 and 10,000 words. This chapter should display the
levels of research, critical analysis and originality commensurate with research at
doctoral level. It should not merely be a general account of the topic, nor an

2. A detailed plan of work for the following year. This research plan should be
approximately 1,000 words long.

#1 rather terrifies me. Critical analysis! Originality! Eeeep!

(Yes, I knew coming in I need to accomplish this. It doesn't make it any less terrifying in practice.)

Also, by Wednesday night, I need to revise my FAoD yet again.

So. If I am screamy and scattered? Be a little patient with me.

Now, I'm going to spend the next four hours playing Skyrim, since it's the last chance I'll get.
hawkwing_lb: (DA2 isabela facepalm)
"Something To Do With Dionysos? Performance and transformation in the archaeology of the sanctuaries of Asklepios in Hellenistic Greece, with relation to the theatres at Athens and Epidauros."

Epiphantic healing and theatrical performance are fundamentally transformative occasions. The former has to do with the transformation of a sick body into a healthy one; the latter, as Aristotle said of tragedy, "effects the proper purgation" of the emotions it arouses. Now Aristotle has used the language of medicine to refer to drama: κάθαρσις, he says: purgation, cleansing, purification, and drama and healing cult exist in a similar cathartic conceptual space. The performance of healing and the performance of drama are linked visually and spatially, in the tangible connections of architecture, and in the - far less concrete but nonetheless present - subjective archaeologies of experience. This paper tries, briefly, to relate the two.

Spoken papers require a rather different style than purely written ones, it transpires. The uses of rhetoric, I am learning to appreciate them.

I appear to need to go sit in the library with Travlos' Pictorial Dictionary of Athens and the Nothing to do with Dionysos conference collection. Library: do not want. Next week, maybe. I have a month and a half.


Jan. 5th, 2012 08:18 pm
hawkwing_lb: (CM JJ What you had to do)
Funding Application of DOOM is drafted and sent to supervisor.

All 2,600 words of pain and 22.5 hours of work of it.

I go make the thud and play videogames for a while now.
hawkwing_lb: (DA2  title screen)
It occurs to me that, as often as I thrash and moan around here when things aren't going well, I mention less often when events surprise me by being not terrible.

Which is not to say I'm looking forward to next week's government Budget, and the concommittant reduction of all things necessary to life. But this week? It has been surprisingly pleasant and productive. I wrote some thesis, some more reviews, I read some books, I climbed some...

Yes. Pleasant. Apart from being Bloody Freezing, but we can't have everything.
hawkwing_lb: (Bear CM beyond limit the of their bond a)
Dear world: thank you for not kicking me in the teeth.

I'm feeling surprisingly all right with the world, thanks to a set of fortunate meetings, circumstances, and friends. My good friend M. has the good news of a job in London, and on Friday night there was climbing and pizza with him and his girlfriend. I'll miss him, but I'd forgotten how much I enjoy company. The world seems a lot better in the company of friends.

A good weekend, with plenty of reading and a little bit of work. Despite my usual not-sleeping trick, I managed to roll out of bed in time to go to class today. Success! Followed by photocopying of my interlibrary loans (and dear god I hate photocopying archaeological reports, because they're so awkwardly large), and lunch with another friend, J. Who is brilliant and smart and makes me feel as though I might be slightly smart, too.

After which I came home and napped for three hours. Napping is an astonishingly pleasant way to spend the afternoon, in case you were wondering.

And in further good news, there is a tiny flicker of hope on the horizon when it comes to money matters. On the horizon, not here, and tiny, rather than large - but it's nice to have even a little hope right now.
hawkwing_lb: (Default)
You will be fascinated to hear, no doubt, that I ran 2.5 miles in 27:30 tonight (for certain values of running, at least) and then proceeded to jujutsu, where I acquired many, many bruises.

Not fascinated? Oh, well. Neither am I, really. I'm much more fascinated by the prospect of actually finishing Lysias On the Murder of Eratosthenes, which I might manage in another two days work or so. I mean, my translation is far from perfect? But it is occasionally comprehensible, and with frequent recourse to the dictionary, I can figure out what the hell is going on here.

One of the things that's interesting to me is how Euphilites, the speaker - or rather, Lysias, writing for Euphilites, the defendant - picks and chooses from the law. The law permits the killing of an adulterer; Lysias wants to imply that it commands so.

The other thing which is rather fascinating is the focus and assumptions of Athenian law. A man who, entering another man's house, commits adultery by persuasion, is guilty of a greater crime - or so says Lysias - than one who commits adultery by forcible rape. Persuasion, it seems, constitutes a greater threat to the integrity of the oikos - and so to male-lineage inheritance, the right to citizenship, deme and phratry membership etc - than force. The Athenian concern with inheritance and citizenship is also in evidence in Demosthenes' Against Neaira, among other places. It's a reminder that completely assumptions may apply in a different time and place.

By modern lights, it's seriously screwed up. Women! Not really people!

...No, wait. "Women are people too" is still a radical position to take, in many quarters.

Wrote some fiction today. Not very good fiction, but hey. I have to fit it in around Ancient and Modern Greek. Don't talk to me about my thesis. I'm hoping it'll write itself while I'm not looking. Please let it write itself?

They tell me that taking a couple of days off is occasionally healthy, so I'm trying that. For certain values of off that include Greek, and fretting.


Sep. 16th, 2011 11:33 pm
hawkwing_lb: (Bear CM beyond limit the of their bond a)
Draft to-do list:


Travel report for Trinity Trust Written: must submit.
Travel report for IIHSA bursary fund Drafted: get supervisor's comments and submit
Invoice Tor.com
USA tax paperwork
Apply for Graduate Office Disabilities note-taker etc work. Sent.

Books, reviews, blogging

Fix review of Tempering of Men for SH - withdrawn: brain no worky, and I'm not putting in another two hours' work on edits for something I have no guarrantee of being paid for.
Blog books read
Bring catalogue up to date
Plan and draft posts on Barbara Hambly for Tor.com - circa four, I think.
Reviews owed by end Oct/start Nov: Weber ABF, Pierce Mastiff, McDevitt, Wooding Jackal.
Decide on books to review for next two quarters of Ideomancer and request review copies. Done.


Acquire locker - Monday
Join Climbers, Judo clubs, Arch Soc.
Acquire network access on campus
Return to exercise programme An auspicious beginning.


Lunch - Monday Cancelled
A's engagement party - Monday, evening Stayed home sick.
Discover who remains in country, who has returned to country, and who has sailed for Byzantium, and see who feels like semi-regular meets
Find climbing partner
Contact M, find out if has returned from Far California email sent.


Find out about Greek government scholarship thingy
Sort notes
List books for inter-library loan (for Nov/Dec)
Write chapter/10K words - end Oct.
Investigate IIHSA internship
Ancient Greek

I'm sure I'm forgetting things. However, this will do as a start.


Sep. 16th, 2011 06:50 pm
hawkwing_lb: (dreamed and are dead)
When I left, it was high summer, green and fair. Now autumn is in the trees, and the breeze smells of rain, earth and falling leaves.

The difference between Greece and here is bizarre, startling: all the smells are different, softer, damper. The scent of bay and traffic fumes and cigarettes and olives, frying cheese and courgette and aubergine and the open doors of bakeries breathing sausage and cinnamon, is all gone. Here all smells of lavender, horse-chestnut, salt, kelp, petrol, river-water. The light is less harsh and vibrant, the sky no longer the intense Mediterranean blue. Grey clouds and the patter of rain, a lance of slantwise sunlight gilding the edges of the buildings and the purple-toned promise of more rain on the horizon -

- I'm home.

I arrived in early this morning, at oh-dark-hundred and something, and my mother picked me up and gave me a lift home. I didn't sleep until two hours later, when the second wind of travelling had worn off and the cat finally settled down to sleep on my shoulder instead of knead it. (It appears Vlad still remembers me fondly. Despite the fact that he puked on some of the post that arrived for me when I was away.)

After I slept, I succeeded in making it in to college in time to register for the last day of Postgrad Registration, and spent an hour catching up with my supervisor, babbling about how wonderful and marvellous and useful my time away had been. I did more bureaucratic things, nicked a drink of 7Up at a postgrad welcome meeting that I dropped in at for five minutes, and was away home.

I need to write reports for the two organisations that gave me money. I also need to unpack. I think both of these things will need to wait until tomorrow. Or possibly Sunday. I think I broke my energy.
hawkwing_lb: (sunset dreamed)
My funding application has been turned down.

I knew it was going to happen - it was long odds to start with - but I couldn't stop myself hoping. Now that hope is gone, I should start dealing with the reality of having Zero Income next year. (The government is still good for my fees, at least until next year, I hope.)

But first, I think I'm going to go scream in frustration and cry for a bit.
hawkwing_lb: (DA2 isabela facepalm)
My funding application has been turned down.

I knew it was going to happen - it was long odds to start with - but I couldn't stop myself hoping. Now that hope is gone, I should start dealing with the reality of having Zero Income next year. (The government is still good for my fees, at least until next year, I hope.)

But first, I think I'm going to go scream in frustration and cry for a bit.
hawkwing_lb: (Bear CM beyond limit the of their bond a)
There I was in the gym last week, putting in a wee bit of a run, when one of the gym staff walks up to me. Do I want, she asks, to sign up for this little event they're holding next Monday, a 'Try-athlon' for beginners?

"Sure," says I, because I'm always game for a challenge. Quite often I'll flame out halfway through, but I'm game. So I signed my name to the list, and went away.

That's the reason I arrived at the gym this afternoon at 1500 hrs, with a bottle full of water and limbs full of trepidition. The beginners' course consisted of a 10K cycle, a 2K row, and a 3K run: me, I run and row fairly regular, but if I cycle ten minutes twice a week, that's a very rare week.

Reader, I tell you true: it was hard.

There were four of us at 1500. Me, and three guys who looked a lot fitter than I feel.

The cycle wasn't so bad, actually, although I consider it a fortunate thing that the nice gym people provided us with free Lucozade. (And a sweat towel each.) Nice gym people. Kind gym people. I completed my 10K cycle inside forty minutes, and thought I was doing fine.

So I was, for a little while. The 2K row, I managed inside ten minutes. Rowing is normally fine with me, but by this point I was starting to have trouble keeping my rhythm.

Then I stood up to move on to the treadmill.

My legs. Oh, my legs. They felt like they were made of wibbly-wobbly-wonder; like custard, or sloppy jelly. I staggered onto that treadmill.

The run... wasn't, really. Normally I can kick out a ten-minute mile with reasonable ease. I'm not very consistent at the two-mile mark, but a time inside twenty-four minutes is usually doable.

Not today, though. Today, I was a walker. I managed my 3K - approximately 1.9 miles, rounded up - but it took me twenty-six minutes and counting. The world's most annoying stitch kept materialising in my side. As soon as I got my speed up, it would come back. And my legs would go all floppy-wobbly.

I'm glad swimming was not a part of this wee event. I hate pool swimming, and I'm a much less competent swimmer than a rower. I would be in considerably more pain this evening if we had been moving through water. And I hurt a lot right now.

Despite what has to be a whole bucketload of exercise endorphins.

But I'd do it again. In fact, I intend to do it again. I think I could manage to do that kind of thing about once a week, even if I also climb and do a bit of whichever martial art is handiest, if I set aside a two-hour block of time to do it in.

We'll see if I actually do.

This counts as a productive day, because I also visited the library and did an hour's concentrated note-taking. I'm a bit too wasted to take more notes now, though.


hawkwing_lb: (Default)

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