Screw November
Nov. 14th, 2011 07:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hawkwing_lbNovember is an evil month.
So are January and February - and December, although December can usually be relied upon to have presents in the middle of it* - but November is where the evil starts, so I resent it all the more.
The cool, damp mist of November afternoons can be beautiful. Trees shedding the last of their leaves, yellow and brown, and standing stark against hedgerows. The smell of woodsmoke and rain, and how everything turns purple and twilight-blue at the edges on a clear day. The way the moon rides up in the daylight sky.
But the dark. The damp. It gets inside my head and bones and lives there, the soft whispery darkness of depression, the quiet turning towards hibernation, the desire to be shot of all the goddamn people who fill the buildings and the streets, the dreary greyness of days that never really brighten, the ache in my wrists and ankles when it rains - which is often.
Right now? I hate all human beings. I hate my thesis. I want to get away from Dublin somewhere there are hills and mountains and clear my fucking head.
Much as I hate the heat? It turns out I love sunlight. I guess I'm going to have to figure out how to go live somewhere there's more of it than here.
*Although not this year, because of the brokeness.
So are January and February - and December, although December can usually be relied upon to have presents in the middle of it* - but November is where the evil starts, so I resent it all the more.
The cool, damp mist of November afternoons can be beautiful. Trees shedding the last of their leaves, yellow and brown, and standing stark against hedgerows. The smell of woodsmoke and rain, and how everything turns purple and twilight-blue at the edges on a clear day. The way the moon rides up in the daylight sky.
But the dark. The damp. It gets inside my head and bones and lives there, the soft whispery darkness of depression, the quiet turning towards hibernation, the desire to be shot of all the goddamn people who fill the buildings and the streets, the dreary greyness of days that never really brighten, the ache in my wrists and ankles when it rains - which is often.
Right now? I hate all human beings. I hate my thesis. I want to get away from Dublin somewhere there are hills and mountains and clear my fucking head.
Much as I hate the heat? It turns out I love sunlight. I guess I'm going to have to figure out how to go live somewhere there's more of it than here.
*Although not this year, because of the brokeness.
