between the rock and the cold, cold sea

Until I came home to check my email, at least. My Postgraduate Funding Progress Report is due by January 31, and if it is found unsatisfactory, reimbursement of moneys will be sought.

This is the last thing my anxiety needed to hear.

Although I bought holiday gifts and went to the gym - at last - so up until then, it was a pretty good day. Managed some exercise biking - 5K - and a stagger on the treadmill, which turned to be pathetic intervals: my wind is gone, and it was as much as I could manage to cover 2 miles in 29 minutes. (Fifteen minute miles. Goddamn, I could hike faster than that. Or I used to be able to.)

Benchpressed 10kg plus the bar, though, without the Smith cage. So that feels good.

---

Books 2012: 266-269


266. Jennifer Crusie, Faking It. Ebook from Kobo.

So, that happened. Funny quirky comedy-of-errors romance. I enjoyed it surprisingly well.


267. Marie Lu, Legend. Publication details not to hand.

YA dystopia, well-written if a touch slight. High angst quotient. People who like this sort of thing (which sometimes includes me) will like this.


268. James P. Blaylock, The Aylesford Skull. Titan Books, 2012. Review copy from Titan Books.

Longer review forthcoming from Tor.com, eventually in internet time and shortly in real-life time. A novel in the mode of eighties steampunk, languorous of pace, involving a nemesis in the mode of Professor Moriarty with cameos from Arthur Conan Doyle. It didn't hit my kinks, but it's not a bad book.

12km in 30:00, exercise bike. Benchpress: was a mess, moved out of the Smith cage, had trouble lifting 3x10 30kg. Bicep curl: also a mess, 2x12 14kg. Back extensions, 3x10. 2 miles treadmill in 26:20. Rowing cooldown, 1km in 5:15.

Mass: 102.4-103.2kg

6km in 15:00, exercise bike. 3x12 reps @40kg, benchpress. 3x10, back extensions. 3x12 reps @ 40kg, seated row. 3x8 reps @18kg, bicep curl. Treadmill, intervals, 3.2km in 26:00.

Mass: 100.3-101.3kg. (The gym scales seems rather labile.)

---

Greek accomplished. New thesis chapter file document opened. I suspect I need to make an outline for What Goes Here. Unexpected socialising with a friend-like person who has just submitted her thesis.

Tonight the train has internet. The future, can has?

So, turns out when I go to the gym in the mornings, running first thing is contra-indicated. I need to warm up first before I try going flat out. I'll remember that for next time.

Still. Some messy running to start with. 12km in 32:40 on the exercise bike. Benchpress: 1x5 @50kg, 1x5 @65kg, 3x5 @60kg. Seated row: 3x12 @40kg. Bicep curl: 3x12 @16kg (8kg per arm). Back extensions: 3x10. Lateral raise: 3x12 @10kg (5kg per arm). 0.5 miles in 5:00, treadmill.

Mass: 101.6-102kg.

Afterwards, I was starving. I'm still hungry, in fact, despite a giant bowl of soup. But I should do a small bit of work before my Plato class - and before class I can have a snack.

Also, have an interesting link about Cesare Borgia and Machiavelli.

Plato Greek, review for Tor.com, Callimachus Greek, cannibalising of old presentation for instant!progress on the thesis, gym.

1.38 miles in 15:00, treadmill. 11km in 30:00, exercise bike. Benchpress 1x8 at 35kg, 3x5 at 40kg (both including bar), bicep curl 2x5 at 24kg, 1x5 at 16kg. Some other mucking about with free weights. Very short cool-down row.

Mass: between 101.2 and 102kg.

Perhaps I am fit enough to contemplate climbing again without much terror. We shall see. (Starting maybe Sunday week, I think. I will have a desk on campus by then.)

Today I socialised with some of my favourite people, who are briefly home from being all emigrated to England-land. I formatted and submitted an interview for the Tor.com column. I searched after Koan inscriptions, mostly fruitlessly, but I have some references to track down. I'll probably need to ILL them, worse luck. I exercised: mile in 10:10, treadmill; 12km in 32:15, exercise bike; benchpress, 2x8 @ 20kg+bar, 1x5 @25kg+bar, 1x5 @27.5kg+bar; bicep curl, 3x8 @18kg (9kg/arm). Some more messing around with free weights. Cooldown run, 0.5 miles in 5:10.

Today I ran four miles (or a little more) in fifty minutes. Fear me, for I am mighty. Or not so much. Sigh. At this rate I might be able to outrun the zombie hordes by the time I'm forty.

I am tired and unable to concentrate and stressing about things I can't control. Mostly money. It's making me a bit screwy - hasn't helped that the parent's been sick, or that I'm trying to scrape together bits of my thesis chapter from... I don't know what. My brain is gone. My motivation is gone. I am afraid.

Gym: 2 miles in 23.5 minutes, which is an improvement over last week. Still can't run a continuous mile, but got this result by doing faster intervals. Some weights, a short go on the bike, stretching.

Sigh. Need more endurance now.

---

Also now: need to write more thesis. Which is hard, because, well. Thesis.

So, gym. Less pathetic than Friday, but still pathetic: 0.6 miles on the treadmill, absent some other faffing around, 10K in 28 minutes on the bike. Some few weights.

Also, I am now 102kg. My ankles and knees do not thank me. So I suppose I will have to do the Boring Constant Exercise programme until I reach a more appropriate fighting weight. Alas.

Now I sit in the library (I'm actually in college, how shocking) and attempt to read the internet before settling down to work. I still have to review Above, and I just keep getting the intro paragraphs all wrong. (I blame leahbobet for writing such an interesting, complex book.) I am at the point of saying, "Screw it," and writing nonsense just to get a start on it. Or giving up and weeping frustrated tears of insufficiency.

At some point I need to consolidate my to-do list and Make A Damn Plan. That can wait for the evening, I think. Or possibly tomorrow.

Tonight: running (2.5 miles in 29:30, in intervals), climbing, being social with people of whom I am exceedingly fond.

Apparently life goes better when I socialise. Even if being social turns out to be expensive, the difference it makes to my mood is quite extraordinary.

Tomorrow I'm supposed to take a black belt grading for Shotokan. It's been delayed, and I haven't trained in four weeks? I'm not really looking forward to this right now, but hey, the worst that happens is I make a fool of myself in public. Yay.

...Hopefully this will actually crosspost to LJ. One must always hope. Always and forever.